My new way of presenting cancer in conversation is this: “Yeah, a few years ago my husband decided to get cancer, but it wasn’t good for ME so I made him get rid of it”. It helps take the edge off the severity of the word “cancer”. I know cancer isn’t funny, but it’s not funny when someone slips on a banana peel either, but people laugh. So let’s hear it for laughing in the face of cancer. Humiliate the bastard and maybe it will go away! The format is Letterman’s the list is mine:
TOP TEN REASONS TO LAUGH IN THE FACE OF CANCER:
10 – You screw your insurance company by finally taking full advantage of those insurance benefits you’ve been getting hosed for!
9 – Even your bitchy in-laws will have to be nice to you!
8 – Free weight loss, no diets, no exercise, no programs!
7 – No one busts you when you go out in public in your jammies.
6 – If you need a pain-killer, you get the REALLY good stuff.
5 – It’s like a hall pass. No matter how crazy you act, no one gives you a hard time.
4 – If you have to get surgery, you can make them return your boobs to their full and upright position.
3 – Your kids have to start helping around the house…seriously, this is what I have to do to get you to clean your own toilet?
2 – All of a sudden, picking up dog poop doesn’t seem so bad!
And the Number One reason to Laugh in the Face of Cancer.
1 – YOU’RE GONNA LIVE!